Friday, Mar. 19, 2004 - 3:30 P.M.

Endurance.

Dedicated to my three friends who are currently in various stages of pregnancy.

1. Immediately upon arrival at the hospital demand the drugs. Do not let them get you into a wheel chair. Do not fill out any goofy paperwork. Do not put on a gown. Do not put on a brave face. Get. The. Drugs. I know there are some of you who are going the natural route. Please understand, I love you. I commend you. I am 100% behind you. But I do not envy you. And I don�t understand you. Get. The. Drugs.

2. Request the best looking anesthesiologist on staff. Look, you are staring down the barrel of long hours and incredible pain. You need something to remind you that not all men are not like your baby daddy. Trust me on this. A great looking man. A long needle. Blissful, pain numbing narcotics. Um, where was I again?

3. There may be a brief but very painful point when the anesthetic wears off. If your spouse is unlucky enough to have his hand in yours at this moment, it is your duty to obliterate it.

4. If your spouse is dazzlingly stupid enough to complain about said obliteration, do it again. And again.

5. Demand More Drugs. Demand More Drugs. Make it a mantra.

6. Enjoy the birth of your baby. There is nothing else like it.

7. Don�t keep the baby in the room with you all the time no matter how much you want to. And you will want to. Take time to rest. Let�s face it, one or two days of rest is squat. You�ll never rest again. That�s right. Never.

8. Think about this--all the people who told you �You�ll never have to worry about a babysitter.� Yeah. Start worrying.

You Give Me Fervor - Friday, Feb. 17, 2006
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Ebert And Roeper? Watch Your Backs. - Tuesday, Nov. 29, 2005
Coffee? Tea? Map? - Monday, Nov. 07, 2005

� Purplecigar

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