Monday, Feb. 07, 2005 - 4:20 P.M.

I was trolling the around web recently casting about for sites specifically for writers when I was hooked into one particular site which had numerous links. Man, I love links. One of the links lead me to a user group. The user group caught my attention due to the fact one could submit a story/essay/article what have you to the group and any members who wished to do so would send back a critique of the piece. And it focused exclusively on humor writing. Excellent, what a find!

I signed up and almost immediately sent out an item for critiquing. Even though, in my heart, I knew that whatever the criticisms were, I mean, if there were any at all, I�d not listen anyhow. Who are these people to tell me how to write? Self-preservation is second only to procrastination for us writers you know. And, since you all are incredismart I know you�ll read this paragraph with the appropriate amount of tongue-in-cheekness with which it was written.

After I submitted that little piece of my soul I actually read the guidelines for submitting. Cart before the horse much? Which takes me back to an exercise we did in eighth grade economics. The teacher handed out a sheet of paper and told us that we should read all of the directions on the page before beginning. We were told to keep the page face down on our desks until she told us to begin. After everyone had a paper we were cleared to begin and we all flipped our papers over. The sheet had directions on it numbered one through 50. Simple things like, 1. Write your name on a separate sheet of paper; 2. Write the date; 3. Write the name of your school, etc. I�m working feverishly to finish and when I finally get to number 50 guess what it says?

50. Do not do anything on this sheet. Put your pencil down and sit quietly.

When I looked up from my paper I noticed an awful lot of the class looking back at me. And snickering. I wasn�t the only one suckered but there weren�t many of us. The point is, I�m a do first read directions later kind of gal. It�s gotten me in a fix on more than on occasion and yet�I still do it. What would Freud say?

Back to the guidelines regarding submissions to the group, which clearly state �no profanity.� I�m thinking, �no problem!� Know what? It�s a bit of a problem. Apparently my entries contain curse words more often than not. Evidently I have trouble getting my point across sometimes without resorting to usage of a strong, profane word.

Now, what kind of writer does that?

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Ebert And Roeper? Watch Your Backs. - Tuesday, Nov. 29, 2005
Coffee? Tea? Map? - Monday, Nov. 07, 2005

� Purplecigar

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